Imagine being bitten by a snake. Instead of tending to the wound and healing from the poison, you spend all your energy chasing the snake—demanding to understand why it bit you, trying to prove that you didn’t deserve it. The more time you spend pursuing the snake, the longer the poison lingers in your body. This metaphor perfectly illustrates what happens when we fixate on the cause of our pain instead of focusing on healing.
Life presents us with inevitable hardships—betrayal, loss, rejection, and disappointment. When we experience emotional pain, our first instinct is often to seek answers. We want to understand why someone hurt us, why circumstances unfolded the way they did, and whether there was something we could have done differently. But in doing so, we sometimes delay the very thing we need most—healing.
The Trap of Seeking Justification
When we are wronged, we crave validation. We want to prove that we were mistreated, that we didn’t deserve the pain inflicted upon us. But constantly replaying events in our minds, analyzing every detail, and seeking closure from those who hurt us can become an endless cycle.
The reality is, even if we get answers, they rarely satisfy us. Knowing why someone betrayed us doesn’t erase the betrayal. Understanding why life threw an obstacle our way doesn’t undo the struggle. Clarity can be helpful, but it is not the cure. What truly heals us is acceptance—choosing to let go, even when we don’t have all the explanations we wish we had.
Acceptance Over Explanation
Acceptance does not mean condoning what happened or pretending it didn’t hurt. It means acknowledging reality as it is, without resistance. It’s about shifting focus from “Why did this happen to me?” to “How can I move forward from this?”
Healing begins when we stop chasing the snake and start tending to the wound. Instead of seeking validation from outside sources, we turn inward. We give ourselves permission to heal without needing permission from those who hurt us. We recognize that closure is something we give ourselves, not something others owe us.
Practical Steps to Heal
If you find yourself stuck in the loop of seeking explanations, here are some ways to shift toward healing:
- Practice Radical Acceptance – Acknowledge what happened without judgment or resistance. Say to yourself, “This is my reality, and I choose to heal.”
- Redirect Your Energy – Instead of spending energy analyzing the past, focus on what you can control—your mindset, your response, and your path forward.
- Allow Yourself to Feel – Healing doesn’t mean suppressing emotions. Give yourself space to grieve, be angry, or feel hurt. But don’t let those emotions define your future.
- Find Meaning in the Pain – Every experience, no matter how painful, carries a lesson. What can you learn from this situation? How can it shape you into a stronger, wiser version of yourself?
- Let Go of the Need for Justice – Sometimes, we won’t get apologies or explanations. Accepting this allows us to reclaim our power rather than waiting for closure that may never come.
Conclusion
Healing isn’t about proving we were right or getting others to acknowledge our pain. It’s about choosing peace over resentment, self-care over self-destruction, and acceptance over endless questioning. The longer we chase the snake, the longer the poison lingers. But the moment we stop, turn inward, and focus on our own healing, we take the first step toward true freedom.
Let go of the need to understand everything. Trust that your energy is better spent on healing rather than chasing the past. Because in the end, healing is not about getting answers—it’s about finding peace within yourself.
TheSpiritualExplorer 